Kids are Fun

I've been babysitting. Monday and Tuesday I only had to cover half days and only had one angel. Monday when Jimmy got off the bus, I was a bit surprised when the door opened and the first kid to the door was not Jimmy but some other boy who stood there and yelled, "can Jimmy come over and play?" I told him maybe when his mom got home. In repeating the story to my sister, she said that was Ryan and he asks the same question everyday, much to the amusement of the bus driver. So Tuesday, the door opened and I saw the bus driver chuckling first before Ryan yelled, "can Jimmy come over and play this summer?" This is funny because it happens the same way every day but also because Jimmy just kind of walks by him and doesn't say anything. Not, "yeah, I want to go." Or, "no, I don't want to go." Or, "bye." Or, "call me later." He just walks off and heads home. And Ryan doesn't seem to mind.

Yesterday and today, I had a full day with both Jimmy and Carolyn (5) since summer has officially started for them. I know Bill Cosby's done the whole "kids say the darnest things" bit but they really are funny people. They are at that age when:

• They know what constitutes "breakfast food" and are quick to point out things like, "we can't have chicken nuggets for breakfast!" Which really only means, they'll just wait until 10 AM before asking for chicken nuggets claiming it is "lunch."
• The way you make Kraft Macaroni and Cheese is totally different from the way they "usually" have it and couldn't possibly eat it your way. "It tastes different." They did however enjoy my chocolate chip pancakes because apparently I put way more chocolate chips in than mommy.
• The pool is never too cold, even if their lips are purple and they are blinking icicles off their eyelashes.
• Bathroom talk is hysterical.
• Knock, knock jokes are too.
• The rules for any game are impossibly complicated and change very quickly depending on who is winning. At one point we had to run to different bases with our fingers crossed and only facing one way and had to try to make each other say, "what," while dodging a ball thrown by the person who was "it." Then the rule changed for "just the big kids" (Jimmy and I) and we could only stay on base for 30 seconds and the new forbidden word became "yeah."
• Running around chasing someone never gets old, even if there are no rules.
• You can never eat too many Popsicles.
• They say thinks like, "of course I know how to go to Google. What do you think I am, stupid?" And when you reply, "it's not nice to say 'stupid,'" they say, "then how come you just said it?"
• Riding your bike three houses away to the end of the street is a long way. Too long to go without a helmet. And to think I rode for 18 years without one.
• Finding an inch worm is the "coolest" thing to happen during the day. And losing it (or crushing it in one's fist, a la Lenny and the rabbits) is the biggest disappointment of the day.
• They ask questions like, "who invented skydiving?"
• They'll tell you Scooby Doo is for kids and they prefer the pre-teen shows like, iCarly. I have yet to actually see an iCarly episode but you know it's a turning point when they are watching shows with real actors instead of cartoons.
• They get a tad annoyed when they draw you a picture and you can't identify exactly what is happening in it. Better just to give vague compliments and wait for their explanation.
• They still will get cuddly with you when you least expect it.

So I've been busy reconnecting with my inner child which has been good. It's kept my mind off of things like job-hunting and our ant problem. I know ants are not household pets but I still can't help but feel a little bad when I see them all bustling about outside the little Hotel of Death, knowing that they are just feeding off the poison of one another, marching to their deaths. Somehow vacuuming them up, as I did the other day, seems more humane - like a roller coaster ride to a better place. What will the children say about all this?